‘I’m not [making] the same mistake twice’: Frugal older brother refuses to cosign on a mortgage for his irresponsible 29-year-old sister after narrowly escaping financial ruin from an ex-wife's deceit

Advertisement
  • Contemplative man looking stressed out
  • AITA for refusing to co-sign my sister's mortgage after what happened with my ex wife?
  • I (35M) got divorced three years ago. Back then I thought I was being the "nice guy" by putting everything in both our names the house, the car, even some of my savings. Big mistake.
  • When things fell apart, she walked away with half of everything and I had to basically start over. It was one of those experiences that changes how you see trust and money forever.
  • Man focused on texting
  • Fast forward to now my younger sister (29F) is buying a house with her fiancé. She asked me to co- sign the loan since her credit isnt great and said I'm the "financially responsible"
  • one in the family. I told her no. I said after everything I've been through, I just can't tie myself financially to anyone who's not me especially not in a relationship situation. She
  • got really upset and said I was punishing her for what my ex did. My parents took her side and told me I'm being too "cold" and should be helping family not acting like everyone's out to get me.
  • But honestly I cant do it. I still have trust issues and Im just trying to protect myself. So now I'm getting guilt- tripped for being selfish when all I'm trying to do is not make the same mistake twice. AITA for refusing to co-sign?
  • R2-Scotia ⚫ Never mind the ex, it's a huge risk. Can you afford 2 mortgages?
  • dncrmom⚫ You don't co-sign anyone's mortgage because it is stupid to do so. Unless you are wealthy enough to cover the payments as a gift. It isn't about trust, it is just facts. If the bank doesn't think she can pay, neither should anyone else.
  • Limelnternational856 ⚫ NTA Tell your parents they can co-sign the mortgage if they want to help family.
  • blondeheartedgodd... I'm sorry, but why don't the parents ever step in to help their own children in these situations? Why do they always lean on the sibling to do it?
  • NTA. If she can't qualify for a loan with her fiancee, then they shouldn't be buying a house until her credit improves.
  • Mysterious_Wave_1... . Honestly man cant blame you at all. After what happened, I'd be super cautious too. I just hope your sister's at least doing a prenup this time around no point repeating the same mistakes. You're not wrong for protecting yourself

Tags

Scroll Down For The Next Article